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  • Writer's pictureEmily Eldredge

📺 IWFGG | What "Self Care" Really Means





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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Hello hello, welcome to Inner Work for Greater Good, my name is Emily Eldredge with ChangeLight, I am the creator of the ChangeLight System and the.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: host of the ChangeLight community and the ChangeLight System course where I teach inner work to changemakers and other people who want to make a difference in the world, I teach you in our work.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: That accelerates your power to make a difference, your power to fulfill the mission that you're here to fulfill.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And to light up the world which can be enough in and of itself that when we light up because when we light up we light up the world so it's all about making a difference, but, starting from the inside.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Which i've found is always the best place to start in my experience anytime I want to make a change anytime i'm noticing a pattern I need to change in my life anytime.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: You know i'm unhappy or what have you is I always start inside because I find that, if I can at least maybe there, so the root cause of something that i'm struggling with.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Or maybe there's you know root in a root for the pattern that I keep keeps repeating in my life.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Now they're all kinds of reasons to go with it, or maybe i'm just not showing up as the leader, that I know I can be i'm having certain reactions triggered reactions.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And it's causing me to not feel as clear and hole in it piece doing what i'm here to do being who i'm here to be.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And so you got to start with that inner work and so that's my focus, especially when it comes to those of us who are trying to make a difference, because, as I always say.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: So much of the time, those of us who are trying to help other people fail to really take care of ourselves and fail to even realize when we need to take care of ourselves.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: So, speaking of taking care of ourselves, I had.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: An interesting conversation with a client of mine this past week, and one part of that conversation I always have interesting conversations with my clients it's not like this was suddenly interesting a lot of my clients they're amazing.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: But the point is there was one aspect of it, and she was talking about self care.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And I forgot the context, in fact I looked through my notes to try to see what exactly what we're talking about why does this even come up.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: But I would say that you know there's pattern is is to tend to think of you know her tendencies to think of other people take care of other people not really think about her own needs.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Until she's gotten to you know past the point of exhaustion or past the point of aggravation, and so it, you know it, we were talking about what it means to care for yourself.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And one and what self care needs, and the reason why I think this is an important topic to discuss and to give you my perspective on it just because.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Self care is such this kind of you know buzz term I guess or buzz is the right word, but you know it's like a term that we hear a lot, you know self care and.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: You know, doing what feels good for you and taking care of yourself and I don't know about you.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: But the image that I often get is um you know you do your nails like that self care, you get your you know you get a massage and that's self care or you it tends to be at least.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: At least in my sort of experience the way I tend to have perceived it and you may perceive it differently, you may be more enlightened than I than I have been but.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Historically, seen it as like some kind of you're pampering yourself and it's usually having to do with pampering some part of your body.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: or even maybe just taking time out to focus on yourself.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And do something that feels you know self care ring you know we're we're or where you're hiring someone else to actually take care of you, which is.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: You could argue is like that's what you're doing when you're getting your nails done that's when you're doing when you're getting a massage is someone else is you're paying someone else to care for you.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And I just want to, I want to deepen the understanding of of actual what I, in my opinion, is actual self care and what is really at the root of true self care.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And it's not getting your nails done and it's not getting a massage and it's not suddenly flying off to another country because you feel like escaping or life.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: I mean those can be expressions of self care and things that you do for yourself, because you need them.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: But what I find is that there are so many forms of self care caring for ourselves that can that lead up to.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And that the the need or that if we implement them, and we take on this attitude towards ourselves.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Then we don't necessarily like have to go rushing off to another place or have to get some to get our nails done or or just need this pampering time i'm not saying we don't need it, let me explain, I feel like i'm not being very articulate here.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Let me just put it this way, what I said to my client was that at the core of self care.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Is self respect, let me say that again what's actually at the core of self care from my attitude is what's actually at the at the core of self care.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Is self respect having respect for yourself in all kinds of ways, so it's caring for yourself but it's also caring for it's it's that because you care for yourself, you make certain choices.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And I made a list about the kinds of things that when we respect those aspects of ourselves or of our lives.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Those are forms of self care and they don't necessarily look like getting a massage or your nails done.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: They don't necessarily look like some kind of spontaneous like I need to take care of me type thing, there are choices that we can make daily.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: That can actually you know, in a way, like preempt us from having to sort of then.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: I gotta do something to take care of myself because we're making these choices all along the way.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: That our expressions of care and respect for ourselves, I feel like i'm being a little ambiguous here but i'm trying to just kind of give you the general and then we'll get a little more specific.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: So when it comes to self care, I wrote a quick list of the things that we can respect for ourselves within ourselves about ourselves that are forms of self care and that then can help us feel more whole and at peace and without having to get all the other things, so one of them is time.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: When we respect our own time.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Then it's easier to, in other words, if you say you know what this is my time for me, or you know what I need the time to do this for my job or for my children or for myself or what have you it's about respecting your own time.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And when we respect the fact that our time is valuable, then we can then set those boundaries and i'm going to use the word boundaries again.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: But setting those boundaries around our time boundaries around our space boundaries around our energy and where we use it and where we put it.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And so respect our own time and know that our time isn't something that we have to give away just because someone wants it.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Our time isn't something that we have to get sucked away from us just because someone is sucking that time away from us.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: That we can actually be respectful of our own time, just as we would be respectful of other people's time so respecting our own time and our own sense of time our own.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Space around like what like the priorities that we have in our lives and what we need to do and what we need to do for ourselves or for the people we care about.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: That when we put when we respect our own time that's actually a form of self care with each of these I want you to think about how does it feel.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: When you don't respect your own time, and you don't and you don't enforce others in respecting your time when you don't set boundaries around your time when you don't.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: make conscious choices about how your you spend your time where you spend your time with whom you spend your time.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: What happens when you don't do that and I can almost guarantee you if you're a woman, I know men have done this, too, but we women all mad like we will just give our time away.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Not even realize how valid really how valuable it is we're realizing how important it is to prioritize where we spend that time.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: or two priorities practice prioritize ourselves and the fact that our time is just as valuable if not in some sometimes more valuable than other people's time.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And so, time is something that is when we respect time our own time our own boundaries and spaces and you know and and what we choose to do with our time that's a form of self care.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Another one is our needs, I mean think about it, ladies like how often do we put other people's needs ahead of our own.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And what happens when we do, how do you feel when you're not respecting your own needs and you're putting other people's needs ahead of your own.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: I understand that sometimes when it comes to children or family or.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: You know I mean there are certain circumstances were yes temporarily it's like I gotta kind of put aside my needs just for this moment, because I need to take care of this other you know let's say this child's need.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: But if we do like chronically if we disrespect our own needs chronically.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: in favor of others needs then we're not caring for ourselves and that's when you get again, how do you feel when that happens if you let that happen in your life, how do you feel I mean i'm sure you've been through this, I know I have.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Where it's that you know, a you're exhausted you feel like your needs aren't being met or people aren't respecting your needs or like with time they're not respecting your time well guess what it's usually because you're not respecting your own time.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: there's somewhere where there's a disconnect for you in terms of respecting yourself and your needs your own time.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: So this is a form of self care respecting your own needs, caring for your own needs, but.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: it's like the reason why I think I feel like I keep saying respect not just care, but like caring about but also really respecting as something that's like this is worthy of respect and to respect that that this is valuable so that's another one.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: boundaries i've said this a few times already okay.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: it's so funny, let me just say that I have sat down so many times before the show or like when I sat down to like write down to you know what am I going to talk about.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And boundaries is this like frequent theme that i'm like I need to talk about boundaries.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: But then I go oh God oh my God it's such a big topic like boundaries are such a big topic and I touched on it in previous shows, as you know, if you've seen some of my episodes.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Where I talked about like if you have anger coming up in a really extreme anger that it could have to do with someone's not respecting your boundaries.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: you're not you're not you're not standing up for your own boundaries you haven't been and so some part of you is angry and it's reactive or.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: You know, there are all kinds of boundaries are like such a whole books written right about boundaries.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: boundary issues and the importance about of boundaries and one of the things I would even say, and maybe I will ultimately do a show about boundaries, and I feel like I do like a whole seminar that founders.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: But that when it comes to boundaries, there are certain kinds of boundaries, because I think sometimes people think of boundaries as walls.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: or they think that you have to use anger, to set your boundaries, there are different expressions of boundaries, and there are different.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: You know, ways that we feel boundaries, there are different types of boundaries that we can have depending on the person, the situation or history, etc.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: But in terms of self care and self respect so much of this is around boundaries and even the basic knowing that it's Okay, for us to have them at all.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: it's okay to have boundaries it's okay to know where I end, and you begin or where you end and I begin.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: it's okay to have that it doesn't mean a lack of love and it doesn't mean a lack of respect for the other person, if anything, when we don't have proper boundaries and we allow other people to disrespect us.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Then there's a lack of respect here and it's a lack of respect of ourselves so even as we might think in terms of you're caring about that other person you're respecting that other person, but it's not truly respectful or caring.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: If they're not respecting yours as well or you're not respecting yours as well it's interesting i'm going to throw in here a story.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: in which a friend of mine is struggling with in a relationship that she's in and it's a new relationship and she was saying that you know.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: You know well she's like she has anger coming up, and she was really struggling with that because she's not comfortable with anger and she's used to being very calm and Nice and kind of understanding and at the fact she's such a lovely woman.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And so, as she was talking with me and others about the situation, she was dealing with she would say well he's doing you know i'm really fed up with this and it's making me really angry and.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: You know all this kind of stuff that her her emotions were clearly trying to get a message to her.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: But she kept going, but you know what but he's really nice he's Nice and will be, but he says nice things, or he does nice things.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: But the Truth and the situate the Truth of the situation is that he was continually violating her boundaries and her request for about like to say hey I need space or I need time again.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And he kept violating it.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: So here she was angry, because she on some level knew that her by her boundaries were not being respected in a request for not being inspected at her needs her, she had expressed her needs to him.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And they were not being respected and here he was violating but nobody else who does these other nice other other nice things and I basically said to her.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: If he's not respecting your boundaries, then he's not being Nice.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: it's not like oh he's nice no actually he's not nice if he's not listening to you and respecting you.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And so, in a way, we can also look at it in terms of we can look at it in terms of other people, but we can also look at it in terms of ourselves.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Am I really being self caring, am I really respecting myself if i'm allowing other people to disrespect me is this a risk fully respectful relationship if i'm respecting them but they're not respecting me.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: know I once wrote a blog that was talking about unconditional love and I remember thinking.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Like that basically my idea of unconditional love and it didn't realize this until I chart until I I dealt with a situation where I was being.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: unconditionally loving to the person and so giving, and all this.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And he wasn't doing that in return, he was being disrespectful but Oh, but he seemed nice no he wasn't showing up in certain ways, and I also wasn't respecting myself in the situation.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And so, in that case, well, I was thinking of myself as being unconditionally loving I was so patient and so understanding, this was not an unconditionally loving relationship, because I wasn't.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: unconditionally loving myself and I wasn't respecting myself and I wasn't caring for myself.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: So that's something that's always always always extremely important to remember when it comes to our relationships with other people because it's not just like.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Oh, you know well i'm being this way if it's a healthy relationship, there will be healthy boundaries, I always say healthy relationships require.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: This is not optional ladies require healthy boundaries, so when we're talking about self care and we're talking about respect for self being the underlying thing for true self care.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: it's about having healthy boundaries and.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: boundaries are a huge part of self care, because when we respect our own boundaries and we enforce our boundaries with other people we are saying to ourselves hey I care enough about you to do this.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And we are saying to the other people I care enough about myself to not put up with this.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: or I care enough about myself to know what I need I was in an event coming up with you know stories, but I was in an event, a few weeks ago, and if I mentioned this to you, while before.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: But I was in an event at an event, a few weeks ago and it was it was like a really social event and seeing all these people that i'd only seen on zoom and we were like so excited to see each other and hugging.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And just I was like lit up even people said it they're like you're just on fire, I was like I am because i'm so happy to be with everyone.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: and get then after like midway through the second day I could kind of feel okay i'm starting to feel a little bit like if I go too much longer i'm going to start to feel dre.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: i'm gonna start to feel kind of tired i'm going to start to feel depleted, and so I just I just noticed that and I was like what.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: I think i'm going to take a break i'm going to go off and be myself because that's what I knew I needed, not to be with other people just be completely in my own energy, and so I headed out the door first who do I see as i'm heading out the door, but other people that I know.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And I said hey i'm gonna can I talk to you later, please I just need to go be alone, right now, just just and I may have even said, like this is just a form of self care for me, I need to go be alone.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And they were like oh sure cool no problem, you know, and I just I literally just went out in the hallway I sat in the sunshine and sitting by myself and I was doing a little things on my phone just sort of checking up and stuff but just relaxing by myself.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And so, for me, that was a form of self care and notice I didn't wait until I got depleted I didn't wait until I was feeling like you know.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: You know, like irritated or like just worn out, I was like Oh, I can start to feel that that could happen if I keep going without taking a break.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: So I stopped and as a form of my own self care I just removed myself, and when you wanted to talk to me while I was removing myself, so you know I just need to sit by myself for a little bit just you know it's very social event.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And then they, thank goodness, they respected it if they had respected it, I still would have set a boundary.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And if somebody had followed me out the door, I still would have said, I am choosing to be alone right now and you're not respecting my boundaries, and I really would appreciate it if you would.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: So you know and then not everybody respects boundaries, and we know this right, even if we express them clearly and kindly it but it's our job to set them.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And it's our job to make sure that we respect and care for ourselves enough to do what we need to do for ourselves okay boundaries is a big topic right.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: um another form of self care is respecting our own well being.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: This is kind of related to what actually I just said, in which I was saying that I was in a state of wonderful well being and all that up and happy.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And as soon as I could start to feel that well being Wayne a little bit that's when I realized I need to shift gears and.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Take a chance to be by myself, so that I could still have that sense of well being for the rest of the event.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And one of the things I often say is that I, my most prized possession, is my well being, it is my emotional health is my emotional well being.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And the what out when I when I say that to people, you know or Some people will say, well, what are you most proud, I will say it's my well being.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Because i've worked so hard for this well being I work so hard to feel this way I work so hard to be lit up that doesn't mean i'm like slogging and slaving no because that's not being lit up, but it means that I.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: I care for myself, I respect myself I set these boundaries I honor my own time and I enforce that when it comes to others.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And I mean I take care of my own needs, or if I feel like somebody else is needed to help me take care of them that I asked for it my husband is absolutely amazing he hasn't been working.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: he's in transition, right now, he was long story, but the point is is that is that has the same job, which is now in New York City and he's doing is going to be doing it in New York.


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Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: But the point is he's had some time off it's been fabulous because he's like making me lunch and making me tea and much, and all this kind of stuff.


00:21:42.930 --> 00:21:48.960

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: But you know, in the past, I would have been like Oh, you know he'd offer and I go no no it's okay it's okay you don't have to.


00:21:49.290 --> 00:21:57.510

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And now they're all just you know i'll say sweetheart if you have time Would you mind doing this for me, because I know that it's going to help me take care of my needs.


00:21:57.780 --> 00:22:06.330

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: While i'm focusing on other things, and so he says sure honey and i'm really blessed with a wonderful husband, I know he's absolutely wonderful.


00:22:07.020 --> 00:22:14.460

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: we've worked really hard on that together, though again this isn't like you know it's just magical everything's just magically wonderful.


00:22:14.730 --> 00:22:22.560

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: it's like we've had to work really hard to be healthy and safe with each other, we each had to work really hard to be healthy and safe within ourselves.


00:22:22.920 --> 00:22:31.380

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: So to that point in terms of emotional well being I have worked so hard for this that I protected.


00:22:32.220 --> 00:22:42.300

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And I don't mean I protected with walls I don't protect it with barbed wire is that's not entirely healthy that's more on the exPower if you've seen the power of videos.


00:22:42.630 --> 00:22:52.230

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: that's episodes that's more on the exPower side of things, where that's like an inner Defender a barbed if you have like air barbed wire that's That would be an inner Defender that's trying to keep people out.


00:22:52.770 --> 00:23:01.200

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Mine is instead that i'm just tuned into when i'm feeling like my well beings going down or when i'm feeling like someone's not respecting it.


00:23:01.410 --> 00:23:10.170

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: or when i'm feeling a need certain things, and then I do what I can to meet those needs, or I asked others if they can help me meet them or I.


00:23:10.680 --> 00:23:20.490

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: You know, remove myself or set boundaries, whatever I need to do, but my well being is my most prized possession, and I would I would encourage you to consider it wars to.


00:23:21.000 --> 00:23:30.510

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: More than anything else, they always say we ain't got nothing unless, even if you're unhealthy, then, then he ain't got nothing something like that I don't know the exact term.


00:23:30.930 --> 00:23:35.310

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: But the point being that health is everything, and I want to put in their emotional health.


00:23:35.790 --> 00:23:46.320

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Mental emotional well being is everything and that you absolutely should protect that from yourself and an honor it and respect it.


00:23:46.770 --> 00:23:53.550

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And that that is what self care is about it's about a lot of times self care is about trying to increase our well being.


00:23:53.880 --> 00:24:00.870

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: But I guess what i'm talking about here is what about all the choices we make before we suddenly feel desperately in need of some kind of.


00:24:01.110 --> 00:24:17.370

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Self care thing, what if we make different choices all along the way, and we can we support and we honor and we respect and we care for our own well being that is actually really what it's about is respecting that.


00:24:17.820 --> 00:24:24.750

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: and, especially, by the way, if you're someone who's worked really hard for yours better damn well respected, that is most prized possession.


00:24:26.190 --> 00:24:35.850

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: body, so when it comes to self care notice how I put body, towards the end I oh I shouldn't say that I didn't necessarily do that deliberately.


00:24:36.210 --> 00:24:43.770

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: But I guess it's because so much of self care or like the thoughts about well you got to care for yourself and parent is about pampering, as I said.


00:24:44.070 --> 00:24:57.150

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And it's so much focused on the body, you know and and i'm not saying absolutely the body is part of self care and respecting the body, so what we put in our bodies, how we use our bodies listening.


00:24:57.390 --> 00:25:09.990

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: To our bodies and when our bodies are saying okay sweetie okay we're done Okay, no, you really need to slow down now and sometimes the body will do that in ways that we don't necessarily like you know with headaches or migraines or.


00:25:10.680 --> 00:25:15.150

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: You know, making a super tired, or we have a lot to do and it's trying to slow us down.


00:25:15.510 --> 00:25:21.660

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And so we can sometimes have this argumentative and antagonistic relationship with our bodies and, of course.


00:25:21.930 --> 00:25:29.760

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: You know weight and all that kind of stuff that people are so anxious about and I believe me i've been anxious about that too and self critical about myself.


00:25:30.450 --> 00:25:34.560

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: But really that the body about what when it's about self care.


00:25:35.010 --> 00:25:49.320

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: That the body is extremely important because, as our temple and as the thing in which we experience life and as the thing that cold the neuro chemicals in our brains and in our guts there and your chemicals that are.


00:25:49.680 --> 00:25:59.550

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: In our guts and I think that we've made in our gut sometimes, but the point is, is that this temple this organism, of course, is extremely important.


00:26:00.030 --> 00:26:13.440

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And then, it can also be a wonderful barometer and messenger for you that's telling you when you're not being self caring when you're not respecting yourself.


00:26:13.860 --> 00:26:25.260

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: So your boss or your emotions are a fantastic barometer for noticing when maybe you're not caring for yourself and you've got to respect and honor those emotions and listen to what they're telling you.


00:26:25.710 --> 00:26:33.090

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: But then also and of course there's like the energetic one like I described, for me, where I could just kind of feel my energy going down I wasn't getting a headache I wasn't.


00:26:33.450 --> 00:26:37.440

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: I wasn't getting depressed I wasn't having an emotional reaction, I could just feel my energy kind of like.


00:26:37.800 --> 00:26:49.560

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: We so it's like emotions your energy listen to your energy notice and then the body, you have any symptoms just honor them listen to them and sometimes.


00:26:49.770 --> 00:26:57.600

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: The answer might be that will you need a certain medical intervention or maybe you need to cut out certain foods or maybe you need to eat more of other foods.


00:26:58.080 --> 00:27:11.340

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Maybe you need to go for a walk I am a huge proponent of walks I go for walks almost every day they're so fabulous they balanced the mind they literally balance the Left brain right brain i'm a shared this with you all before.


00:27:12.270 --> 00:27:17.370

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: But doing things like that that are self caring and self respecting and not only that.


00:27:17.580 --> 00:27:29.910

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Respecting the body enough to take the time out for that so, for example, for me, sometimes i'm like i've got so much work going on and i've got deadlines and I, but I can feel myself start to get more agitated.


00:27:30.180 --> 00:27:40.170

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And i'll go up you know what I need to let me go for a walk because I know that I need to we Center we connect unknowingly the Left brain right brain balancing know that the movements going to help.


00:27:40.500 --> 00:27:53.730

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: me release some of that energy, so the body is a huge part of self care, of course, but again it's respecting your body it's respecting and it's respecting again I feel like.


00:27:54.150 --> 00:28:04.260

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: there's the word care has a certain energy, but the word and the word perspective different energy, though, and so we can we can care about something, but when you respect it, you really are honoring.


00:28:04.800 --> 00:28:13.020

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And you're like you know I may not like my body, but I respect the fact that it enables me to get from point A to Point B.


00:28:13.290 --> 00:28:23.520

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: I respect the fact that it digests my food for me, I respect the fact that it tells me when i'm thirsty do you hear that, so you may not care about.


00:28:24.180 --> 00:28:37.350

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: That you respect it and you respect what your body is doing is constantly working for you it's constantly working for all of us, do you have to think about the fact that you're digesting your food no it just does it.


00:28:37.800 --> 00:28:42.810

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Look it's kind of easy if you think about it you're like no I just put food in my mouth and I don't even think about it.


00:28:43.230 --> 00:28:49.980

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: You may have gut issues i've had i've had issues and sometimes still do so it can cause, you know suddenly you're aware of it, it can.


00:28:50.310 --> 00:29:00.930

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: be uncomfortable but it doesn't mean that i'm actively having to think about telling my body, how to digest the food it knows it has its wisdom, it is worthy.


00:29:01.740 --> 00:29:10.380

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: of your respect mine is worthy of my respect justice your body is worthy of my respect as well, and I can respect the fact that.


00:29:10.710 --> 00:29:27.780

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: You don't respect you and I respect to your body, and you can respect me in mind and with respect one another's about boundaries, with respect, when there's energy we can respect one another's time we can respect each other, which gets to the final point, and also time.


00:29:28.920 --> 00:29:29.790

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Community.


00:29:31.440 --> 00:29:44.100

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: That self care and self respect are hugely about Community and who we surround ourselves with and.


00:29:45.810 --> 00:30:00.360

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: So when we when we surround ourselves with other people who respect their own time, who respect their own boundaries, who respect their own needs, who respects their well being who who who have that respect for themselves.


00:30:00.900 --> 00:30:12.120

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And also, for others, that means that we're surrounded by those people there's going to be this wonderful mutual healthy respect and that, if there are any like.


00:30:12.720 --> 00:30:25.650

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: accidental violations or and you know inadvertent violations or things like that well, then they can be you can have conversations about them, but you're at least speaking from a common understanding of the value and the importance.


00:30:26.100 --> 00:30:39.150

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: of self care and self respect and that's something I found by the way my own journey with as I honor myself it's so much easier if I honor my own Truth, it is so much easier to honor other people's Truth.


00:30:39.630 --> 00:30:48.090

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Because i'm already honoring my own so it's not so hard, whereas if I was just completely giving away my time giving away my energy doing everything for everyone else.


00:30:48.420 --> 00:30:55.290

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Then I would somehow expect everybody else to do the same and that might be just it's not healthy for me it's not healthy might not be healthy for that.


00:30:55.860 --> 00:31:01.500

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: And so the point is it's about the mutual respect and the mutual care and self care.


00:31:02.130 --> 00:31:16.200

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: So community and who you surround yourself with is huge and if you're surrounding yourself with people who are being like completely self sacrificing or have no boundaries or violating your boundaries.


00:31:16.740 --> 00:31:21.540

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: etc or they're not respecting your time that's going to make it a lot harder.


00:31:21.930 --> 00:31:35.400

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: for you to set up those boundaries and establish those parameters and do that self care that you need to do that, all together, added up result in wonderful well being hey.


00:31:36.270 --> 00:31:46.140

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: I hope this has been helpful I hope you've given you a little bit different perspective or a deeper understanding of deeper perspective about your own self care and how important it is that.


00:31:46.800 --> 00:32:02.430

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: That self care is about respecting yourself and then making choices all along the way, not just an occasional manicure pedicure or massage or whatever those are wonderful, but those aren't going to fix.


00:32:03.270 --> 00:32:11.760

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: The lack of self care and the lack of self respect that may have gotten to that point or 17 you're just so exhausted, and you need to get away or whatever so.


00:32:12.150 --> 00:32:23.850

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Okay, so there's little choices that we make, so I encourage you to think about that and and to really absorb this message of self respect because you're worth it.


00:32:24.480 --> 00:32:39.780

Emily Eldredge | ChangeLight: Because you are valuable and you are worth respective every respect all right Thank you so much again Emily ChangeLight world I got this been helpful and what I love you and I will see you next week.


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